Cut Me Open
by Kris Wright
Summary: A twisted tale of Craig and Ellie and how they spend their year together. Takes place during season 6. There will be dark parts later on. Ellie's POV
1. The Beginning

Ok, this summer? It could have been the greatest of my life if one person hadn't been invited along. I got a free ride to Vancouver (with Marco, of course) to spend three months with the amazing Craig Manning. Marco and I were excited when we got there. Hell, I even _jumped_ on Craig when I saw him in the airport. Marco did it, too, so it's not as desperate as one may think. When I looked past this best friend of mine and spot the ever-so-slutty Manny Santos. That's right. Craig invited her to spend the summer, too.

He wanted to have fun with his best friends! (Minus Jimmy because he wanted to stay with his on-again girlfriend, Ashley) Well, basically he ruined it all.

Seriously. Manny was so…pushy. Example: I'd pour some water on Craig (a little harmless fun) and he'd respond by throwing a lot more water at me. Then he'd chase me around, trying to capture me for the big soaking. Marco would be laughing the background, wondering why Craig never picked me, when the star of "Degrassi Girls Gone Wild" would intervene and soak Craig back. So then he'd chase her, grab her, and soak her mercilessly. Of course, she had given up easily so she could be caught, before I could give up so he could grab _me_.

And she did that all summer long. Does anyone know how annoying that is? I mean, I wanted to have some fun with my friends, but she'd grab his wrist at times when I'd want to play cards or do something fun and say (in that whiny voice of hers), "Oh Craigy, I want to do something else." And he'd do what she wanted to do. Even though Marco and I wanted to participate in my idea. But that was the summer. Manny stealing Craig so Marco and I were basically hanging out together in a city we didn't know that well…without the guy who invited us.

I am so glad I graduated. If I had to see Manny one more day, I'd probably wring her neck.

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I really hate not doing anything. Ok, I _am_ doing something, just not something I want to do. I'm waiting for Ash and Jimmy to get out of school so we can hang out. This was Ash's idea, but I really don't like being a third wheel. I mean, they're not all couple-y around me, but sometimes I still feel that way. I hate it, I really do. I don't want to feel that way, but I just get a little lonesome sometimes.

I mean, my mom and I rarely speak to each other. Ashley, my first best friend here in this place, has Jimmy; Marco has Dylan…again; Craig is far off being a rock star, but he still has Manny. And me? I have music, art, and my rubber bands.

There's nothing here for me anymore. I really would just like to leave this place. And that's what I told Ashley when they arrived at The Dot.

"Well, then, go somewhere. Going to London was the best decision I ever made, El," Ashley told me over coffee.

"Yeah, but you had your dad there. I can't go anywhere where I know anyone. I mean, anyone I can stand for more than an hour," I responded as I played with my spoon.

"What about Vancouver? Craig's there."

"Are you joking? Craig would never let me stay with him."

"Oh, come on, Ellie. Craig is one of your closest friends. I'm sure he'd have a room for you."

"But he's busy being a rock star."

"I'm sure you'd be able to get a job," Ashley said. It was easy for her to say. Her father had lined a job up for her before she even arrived. I doubt Craig would be able to pull that off.

"Why do you want to get away?" That was from Jimmy. I think he was still recovering over the crush he had on my last year. I'm glad he had Ashley back.

"I don't want a mundane life. I'm not going to get anywhere waiting for you two to get out of high school so we can all run off somewhere. I just need something new."

"Ellie, go to Vancouver." Ashley said.

When her piercing blue eyes bore into you, you kinda can't say no. It is freaky when she doesn't blink, either.

So, yeah, I was on my way to Vancouver. My mom cried, but I told her I'd write and email and call and whatever else you're supposed to do. I got out my savings and purchased a one-way ticket to Vancouver for the next Tuesday. Yeah, I was really going.

And, yeah, I was freaking out. I didn't know what I was going to say when I arrived at Craig's doorstep. All I knew was that I was surprising him. He hated surprises, after all.

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My flight landed a few minutes after noon. I got off the plane with my carry-on bag with Craig's present inside. It was his birthday, after all. After I grabbed my suitcase from the baggage claim, and called for a taxi and twenty minutes later arrive at Craig's door.

After a few deep breaths, I approached the oak door and rang the bell. May I add that Craig had a very nice three-bedroom condo. He hadn't even been a famous musician for long and he was already raking in the big bucks. I rang the bell again after he didn't answer. I started freaking out. Maybe he wasn't home. Maybe he saw me and was trying to avoid answering the door. But that wasn't Craig, so I pushed that idea out of my head.

As I rang the bell again, I heard the lock turn and the door opened. There standing in a tee shirt and boxers, with tousled hair, was Craig. He had been asleep. But when he saw me, he quickly woke up and a grin spread along his face. "Ellie!" he exclaimed. I had taken that for excitement. "What are you doing here?"

"Hey, it is your birthday, after all. I can't come by and surprise you?"

He laughed softly. "You know I hate surprises."

"Well, how's this for a surprise: do you need a roommate?"

Craig looked at the bag on my shoulder and the case at my feet. "If you'd be the tenant, I'm absolutely in need of a roommate."

I smiled as he opened up his arms and let me advance to embrace me. I don't know why I worried. He was an awesome friend, and an awesome guy. Of course he would take me in! I'm Ellie Nash, ex-drummer for Downtown Sasquatch.

And God how I missed it.


	2. The End of the Beginning

A/N: Wow, thanks for all the feedback for the first chapter! I'm working on the third chapter right now (it's amazing me actually, having inspiration to write!) so that should be up soon. From here the story is going to get darker and more depressing, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel! So, sit back and enjoy this chapter!

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After I had settled into my new bedroom, Craig and I spent the day celebrating his birthday. We went out, had a great dinner and some awesome cake. Then we came back and watched movies until we fell asleep on the couch. I was leaning against him with his arm around my shoulders.

The next day, he took me to the studio, and I reunited with the band members again. Jesse, his drummer, still looked at me as if I were a piece of delicious meat. Of course, it _did_ make Craig uneasy, so I flirted with the guy. Sure, he was 26, but he wasn't bad-looking. He understood what real music was and admired my taste for art and other things.

That day, after Craig and the band recorded a song successfully (and me watching the producer with rapt attention…with shifting gazes toward Craig and Jesse in between), the tall blond asked me out for a drink.

I didn't see any harm in it, so I accepted and said goodbye to Craig outside. Jesse took me to a nice enough bar and we spent half the night talking. I think we may have each had half a drink, so we weren't drunk or stupid. We took a cab back to my new apartment (when I said that to Jesse, my stomach did a little flip) and he walked me to the door. He asked me out for dinner, and I accepted. He kissed me on the cheek (yes, a gentleman!) and waited until I was safely inside before he got back in the cab and went home.

I bet you're wondering where Craig was. Well, I found him on the couch—asleep. He had been waiting for me. Seriously, he's too overprotective for his own good. But I found a blanket in the hall closet and placed it over him before I went to sleep.

Overall, it was starting out to be a great decision coming out to Vancouver.

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A few weeks had passed, and I was starting to get semi-serious with Jesse. Craig was still being protective. He thought Jesse was too old for me. Well, funny enough, I thought Manny was too young for him! (Mentally, of course, she seems to be old enough physically…ugh)

I think the only thing that was bothering Jesse was that I wasn't "putting out". It's not the fact that I'd never had sex; I just didn't want to rush into having sex with _him_. Besides, I'd had sex before, I mean, I did live with my boyfriend for a few months when I was a junior.

Jesse was really sweet, though. I think it was good that I had accepted his offer for drinks. He was good for me. We didn't argue (of course, the relationship was still in the early stages) and we had so much in common. He was almost as fun to be around as it was to be with Craig.

Crap. The reason I started dating Jesse was so I could get over Craig. No more comparing! Ok, so, Jesse and I had a date coming up. It was going to be great. A nice dinner; maybe I'd even let myself try to fall in love with him. (Ha.)

As I was getting ready for our fantastic dinner, I got a call from him. They got a last minute mini-tour along the Toronto area. And they were leaving tonight. As soon as I hung up with him, the lead singer of his band walked through the front door and told me the same thing. I might have looked deflated because he came over and sat next to me. (I was sitting on his bed watching him pack) "Ell, we'll only be gone for three weeks—four tops."

"You're going to be near our home, Craig; don't you think I want to go with you?"

"You want to go back home?"

"Yeah," I shrugged. "I want to see my friends. I want to check up on my mom."

He wrapped me into a hug. "Look, I'll get a video message from everyone." I smiled. "And I'll personally go over to your house to make sure your mother is sober, ok?"

I placed my head on his shoulder. "I guess that starts to make up."

"And when I get back I'll take you out to the most fabulous and expensive restaurant in Vancouver."

"And now you're trying to spoil me."

"I feel bad, Ellie. I want you to come along, but there wouldn't be room for you."

"I know." I reluctantly pulled away from his arms. "Just promise me that you see every single one of our friends, deal?"

"Deal. Man, Ellie, I haven't been living without you for quite some time. I don't know how I'll cope."

"Would you like to take a picture of me, in case you get homesick?" I joked.

"Oh please. Maybe one of your classic poses." I gave him a deadpan look and flipped him off. "All I get is a mental picture?"

"You have a camera, Manning, I'm sure you can make it a real one if you want to."

He smiled at me. "Nah, I think seeing you animated in my mind is better."

Ok, seriously, he needed to stop. I really just wanted to jump him. But I'm not Manny.

"Get your butt out of here before I kick you out," I said instead.

He grabbed his bag and we walked to the front door. "I'll see you in a few weeks. Don't burn down the place, all right?"

"Can I at least have wild parties here every night?"

"As long as they clean up afterwards." He hugged me once more. "I'll call you at every stop."

"Jesse might get jealous."

"Hey, I've known you longer. I get dibs."

I grinned at him. "I'm so glad I get two guys in a rock band fighting over who gets to talk to me first."

"You are special, Nash."

"So are you, Manning. Of course, a _different_ kind of special…" I said with a smirk.

He scowled at me, and then he did something he's never done before: he kissed me on my forehead. Ok, that may sound lame, but it was sweet. I watched him walk away to his cab and felt a lurch in my stomach.

Nope, still hadn't gotten over him, yet. Maybe the distance would be good for me.

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The weeks went by, and I heard that shows kept being added. They didn't return for two months. Of course, my life was on halt because all I did was work at the pet store down the street. Now, the two men in my life were returning and I had something to do again!

Oh, and no, I hadn't lost any feelings for Craig over the separation. If anything, they grew. Absence _does_ make the heart grow fonder. Damn.

Part way through the separation, I adopted a companion whom Craig was totally excited for. I learned from having a ferret, so this time I got a little kitten. Ok, she wasn't that little, but technically she was still a kitten. Over a conversation with Craig (and pictures sent through our cell phones) we named our new kitten Pixie. Slightly a dedication to the Pixies, but she still looked like she had dust all over her. (Pepper was also a name we considered)

I went to the studio to welcome them back. Craig was the first one off the bus and ran toward me. He picked me up and squeezed me so hard, I thought I was going to pass out. Luckily, though, he realized that I needed oxygen to survive, so he released me. Jesse slowly walked up to me with an expressionless face and kissed me rather hard on the mouth. "Um, hi, ow," I told him once he had pulled away.

"Why are you playing me?"

"What?" I asked. I seriously didn't know where this had come from or where this was going.

"We've been together for almost four months and we haven't even slept together, yet."

"Ok, can we talk about this somewhere else?"

"No, we can't. I know you and Craig want to be together, so stop pulling me around."

I was flustered. I didn't know what to say. "You're out." That was Craig's impression of Heidi Klum. I had the sudden urge to say, "Make it work." But it wasn't for fun; he had said that to Jesse.

"What?" Jesse asked him.

"I want you out of the band. You don't treat my friends like that. Just because she wouldn't put out for you, you start accusing her of having feelings for someone else. I don't like it."

"Craig…" I started to say.

"Get lost, Jesse."

"You can't kick me out, man."

"Yes I can. I chose you to be in this band. I can choose you to be out. It's time for you to leave."

"Look, I know you're jealous that I got to stick my tongue in her mouth, but you're got to—"

He didn't get to finish what he was trying to say because Craig had punched him in the face. I don't know if he was trying to protect me or if he was off his meds, but I don't think I've ever seen Craig that pissed.

They started wrestling on the ground and everyone else and stopped to watch. I was afraid that if it was going to go on any longer, some paparazzi would show up and humiliate Craig. I approached them and yelled at them to stop. Of course, they didn't listen, so I tried to take matters into my own hands and pull Jesse off of Craig.

Suddenly I was on the ground on my butt. I was stunned. I looked up and saw Jesse and Craig look at me with the same expression I knew I had. Then it came. The searing pain on my cheek. I placed my hand to my cheek and I still felt shock. Jesse crawled off of Craig and started apologizing. Craig pulled him away from me and told him to get lost. He helped me stand up and asked me if I was ok. I don't know if I even said anything. I was in a daze.

As if in a dream, Craig got a cab and took me home, never letting go of me. I still felt disoriented. All I remember after that is Craig putting me on my bed. (I think it was my bed)

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I woke up the next morning looking into the sleeping face of Craig Manning. Needless to say I was startled. I didn't really remember the events for the day before, so I looked down, just to make sure I was fully clothed.

Good. I was. I really didn't want the first time I would have sex with Craig to be a time I wouldn't remember.

The pain returned to my face. And so did the memories. Jesse had hit me in the face while I was trying to pull him away from Craig. Craig had defended me. He had protected me. Crap, my heart did the swelling feeling thing, again. I placed my hand to my cheek. Wow, was it swollen. Suddenly I really didn't want Craig to wake up and see me like that. As quickly and as quietly as possible, I rolled out of bed and headed out of his room (probably because it had been the closest one to put me in) and into the kitchen for some ice.

I creeped to my room with the ice pack on my face and looked in the mirror over my dresser to survey the damage. I had a big bruise on my left cheek close to my mouth and the left side looked puffier than the right side. While grimacing, I placed the ice back on my face and prayed for the swelling to go down before Craig got up and hoped I could cover it all up with my make-up.

A few minutes later, though, Craig appeared in the doorway. "How are you feeling?" he asked me.

"Like I just had a facial, why thanks," I snarked.

He smirked and sat next to me on the side of my bed. "After he hit you, I wanted to kill him."

"Good thing you didn't. That would have been a huge mess. I wouldn't have been a very reliable witness, either."

A half smile. At least I was starting to bring his mood up. "You were more important."

"Wow, Manning, from you, it feels like it almost means something."

"It should. Ellie, you're my best friend. You're not allowed to get hurt."

"Well, I'll make sure I'll tell the bed that the next time I stub my toe," I said.

Finally, I received a smile from him. And even a small chuckle. I looked down at my lap. Some hair fell on the side of my face and I was too lazy to push it back. I was happy that I was getting him out of his little funk. "Ellie," he said.

I looked up at him. His voice sounded serious. "Yeah?"

"How are you?"

"A little upset. I mean, that's the second guy I couldn't make stay. He got anxious. Sean got bored. Even Marco wouldn't stay."

"I don't think Marco counts, Ell."

"Well, he did before he discovered he was gay. I just…wonder what's wrong with me."

"Nothing's wrong with you."

"Oh yeah? Then how come I haven't had successful relationships like everyone else has? I mean, relationships that last over a year."

He shrugged. "Guys are intimidated by you. You are the most amazing girl and a lot of guys find it scary. You're smart, funny, sassy, amazing, and beautiful." This guy sure knows how to flatter a girl, I'll give you that. I just wished he hadn't been getting my hopes up.

"Don't forget a major freak," I said, reminding him of my…problem.

He rolled his eyes. "Well, then, maybe you just need to find someone who will compliment all of your characteristics. Maybe someone who's a freak, too."

The look he gave me made my stomach start flipping. It made me wonder if he was the guy he meant. Hey, I can hope, right? I glanced down. His eyes were too much to look at. I felt his hand on my shoulder, gently squeezing. I knew he wanted me to look at him, but I just hadn't gotten the courage back, yet. His hand moved and pushed the strands of hair behind my ear. And then it happened.

His wonderful, calloused hand started stroking my non-bruised cheek. I was totally confused by this point that I looked into his eyes.

Holycrapwhyishestaringatmelikethat?

That is what raced through my head before he started inching closer.

Ohmygodheisgoingtokissme!

That would be the second thing that ran across my thoughts before I shut them off and closed my eyes as he inched nearer.

He was less than four inches away from contact when my stupid phone rang. I was hoping he'd ignore it and finally kiss me, but instead, I felt him pull away from me. I sighed and opened my eyes. Reluctantly, I reached for the phone.

Little did I know it was going to be the worst idea I had ever made.


	3. The Beginning of the End

A/N: Here's the dark chapter. WARNING: SUICIDAL THOUGHTS. I promise, the next chapter will be lighter. I think I'm about done with the gloom and doom. But, do enjoy!

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I went numb.

I turned off the phone and just stared at it in my hands.

"Is everything all right?" I looked up and saw Craig. He looked concerned and a little nervous.

"Manny," I mumbled.

"What?" he asked completely confused.

I slowed down my thoughts and focused on what I meant by Manny. Oh yeah. Craig had tried to kiss me.

"What about Manny?"

"What about her?"

Seriously, we weren't getting anywhere. I cleared my throat and continued on. "You tried to….kiss me. You have a girlfriend. I'm not Manny."

"I'm not asking you to be. Besides, I don't have a girlfriend anymore."

What? "What?"

"When I went to see her on the trip, we had a fight and broke up."

I don't understand why he never told me this.

"It was because of you."

Oh, well, that explains it. "Wait, why?"

"She was jealous of all the time I was spending with you."

Manny is such a loser. She should trust him! He's only the greatest guy ever! Oh. I got it. She thought I was going to steal him. If only!

"So, who was that?"

"Who was what?" I asked.

"On the phone."

And then the numbness returned. I remembered listening to my mother's voice. It sent shivers down my spine. "It was my mom."

"What happened?"

"M-my dad." I looked down at my hands. "He was coming home in two weeks."

"Does he have to stay longer?"

I shook my head. "He's coming back in a few days."

"That's amazing, Ell!"

"No, it's not." I sniffed. "He's coming back because he was killed in an explosion."

Saying the words made me shut down. I couldn't think, I couldn't cry, I couldn't speak. I saw my vision shift and discovered that Craig had pulled me into his arms. I didn't even feel his arms around me. It hurt too much.

The pain I couldn't control was returning.

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The next few days went by in a blur. Craig flew back with me for my father's funeral. I still hadn't spoken. I barely moved. I didn't know if I even ate anything.

At the next moment, I was in the church, staring at my father's casket while a faraway voice mumbled incoherently. I glanced down and saw that someone was holding my hand. It was Craig. I looked up and stared back at the brown box which held the body of my father—the man who really understood me. Now, it seemed, that man was Craig.

Next, we were at the cemetery where we were laying my father to rest. I heard sobbing. I looked over and noticed it was my mother. She wept as the soldiers did their thing in honor of my father. Then suddenly, it was over.

Craig drove me to my mom's house and took me inside. He told me that he thought it'd be better for the both of us to be together. But it seemed like he was talking to himself. He probably didn't think that I could hear him.

He sat me at the kitchen table and kissed my forehead before he left. I felt it.

It soothed my pain for a moment, but the pain returned too quickly.

Suddenly, I heard a voice talking. It was my mother.

"…Showed no respect to any of the guests! This was your father's funeral and you had to ruin it!"

Of course, she was berating me.

"You looked as if you didn't even care! Eleanor, I thought you loved your father, but you were just sitting there, staring! You didn't say a word when people gave you their condolences. You were ungrateful."

It was as if she was stabbing red, hot knifes into my heart. I was upset, too. She just didn't experience pain the same way I did, apparently. So, obviously, I snapped.

"Don't you ever say that!" I yelled. My voice was a little hoarse because I hadn't spoken in days. "I was hurting just like you were; I just went into a hole when I heard. The pain was _killing_ me. You know what I wanted to do, Mom? Huh? I wanted to cut myself, all right! But I just shut down. I didn't want to cut, but I didn't want to keep on hurting." I soon discovered that I was crying. I didn't know when they started, but I felt them falling. They were stinging my cheeks as they fell. More pain. More agony. But I couldn't stop it.

"You're not the only one who's broken up about this. I'm going to miss him. He was more of a loving parent than you ever were!" I gave her one last look and saw her blurry face to be hurt. I ran from the house and down the street. I didn't know where I was going. I just let my feet carry me.

I hugged my arms to my chest as I walked blindly. I still had my coat on from earlier, so it helped keep me warm. Sometime later, I had arrived in a hotel. I walked to the counter and asked for Craig Manning's room number. After he got my name and called up to his room, he told me the number.

I walked up to his room and knocked on the door. Craig answered with a concerned look on his face. "Ellie? What's wrong?"

I broke down and felt him pull me into his arms. I cried against his tee shirt as he hugged me close. Later, when I started to calm down, I realized that I was lying on his chest on the bed. I felt one of his hands around my shoulders stroking my back, while his other hand was in my hair, stroking it smooth. I took a few deep breaths and let his body heat, my exhaustion, and the rhythm of his movements lull me into a dreamless sleep. Right before I fell into it, though, I whispered, "I love you."

"I love you, too," was whispered back, but I didn't hear it because I had fallen asleep.

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Any annoying electronic ringing woke me up from my sleep. I looked over at Craig and felt peace. I soon realized that it was my cell phone that was ringing, so I reached into the pocket of my coat which I was still wearing and answered it. "Hello," I said sleepily.

I felt Craig start to shift as he was beginning to wake up. "Is this Eleanor Nash?" a powerful voice responded.

"Um, yes. Who is this?"

"This is Sergeant Unger with the Toronto Police Department."

What the heck? "Ok…"

"Did your mother have a past experience with alcohol or drugs?"

I sat up. "She's a recovering alcoholic. Why are you asking me this?"

"Was there a traumatic experience that happened recently?"

"My father died."

"Oh."

"Why? What happened?"

"Miss Nash…your mother was in a terrible collision about three o'clock this morning." I couldn't breathe. "We believe she was under the influence of alcohol or some kind of drug."

"Is she all right?" I felt a hand on my shoulder. Craig was awake.

"I'm sorry Miss Nash, she was pronounced at the scene."

The man may have said more, but I didn't hear him. I ended the call and felt completely empty. I had lost both of my parents in a matter of days.

"Ellie?" A voice behind me said.

God, the pain hurt. I wanted it to stop. I _needed_ it to stop. I looked down at my covered arms. I could end the pain forever. It's down the street, not across. I'm sure Craig had his razor in his bathroom…

I stood up quickly and ran for the bathroom. Craig called my name again, but I shut the door before he could stop me. Damn. The lock was broken. I put my weight against the door to keep him out. "Just leave the room, ok?" Again, I was crying, and I hadn't known I was.

I think he caught on because he started pushing on the door. "No, Ellie. Open the door. What's going on?"

I silently sobbed as I reached for his razor that was resting on the edge of the sink. It was an easy grab. Now all I had to do was finish it. I pulled up my left sleeve and stared at the scarred skin and placed the razor against my skin. But I stopped. I stopped because Craig was not pounding on the door anymore. He had really left. I was going to be alone, just like each of my parents were.

I prepared again for the fateful cut, but I just couldn't push the blade. I didn't want Craig to find me. If I survived, I'd be too ashamed to face him again. I decided that I could run out of the room as fast as possible and find a place where he wouldn't discover me.

After a deep breath, I stood up and placed my hand on the knob. I hid the utensil in my coat pocked and turned the knob. I ran as soon as the door was open.

I didn't get very far, because apparently Craig had the ability to read my thoughts. He grabbed me and made sure I couldn't get away. Yes, I kicked and screamed, begging him to let me go as I continued to cry, but he wouldn't relent.

"Why, Ellie? Why do you want to do this?" I suddenly stopped flailing. His voice sounded as if he was _crying_. He placed me down on the ground but kept a firm grip on me. I looked at him and saw the tears streaks on his face.

"It hurts," I said as a rush of fresh tears surfaced. I placed my face in my hands.

He embraced me and smushed my face into his chest. "I know it does. I lost my dad, too, Ell. It hurt like hell. But you'll get through it."

"But I didn't just lose my dad…"

"Is your mom drinking again?"

"She was…until the moment her car crashed."

"Oh, God," I heard him mumble. He squeezed me tighter. "I'm so sorry." He kissed the top of my head and held me as I cried.

I don't know how long I was standing there before all my tears were gone. I looked up at him and he stroked the hair away from my face. I probably looked worse than I did last night.

"Ellie, you can't do this. And I know what you were going to do."

I glanced away from him. "I just don't want this pain anymore."

"Too bad." I looked at him. "You're alive, so you're going to feel it. But it's better to feel alive and go through the pain than ending it just so you can't feel one stupid emotion."

"It's powerful."

"Yes, it is. But it's not permanent. If you were going to do…_that_, it would have been."

Craig talks to his psychiatrist too much. But he was right. I can overcome the pain. I smiled slightly. "I don't deserve to have a friend like you."

"What? A true friend?" He smiled. "Ell, whether you like it or not, you're stuck with me."

I looked him in the eye. "Thank you."

He ran his hands through my hair. "Anytime."

"Just don't leave me, too, ok?" I said.

He brought me close to him again and said, "Nash, I'm going to be around you so much, you're going to _want_ me to leave you." He chuckled. I breathed in his scent. It was very soothing, and it made some of the pain disappear.


End file.
